When it comes to dating, I am a huge fan of three things: Openness, comfort, and communication. Openness, meaning nothing is off limits to talk about, comfort, meaning both parties in the relationship never feel as though they will be ostracized for having opinions that differ from the other party, and communication, being able to have an open-ended dialogue where we listen to one another not for the sole purpose of reacting to ones words but understanding them and asking one another to clarify ones point and hear each other out. While I do believe all three are encompassed in the word communication, I don’t believe that many people consciously apply openness and comfort into the dialogues they have with their partner.
So what does all of this have to do with dating someone who is into feet? A damn lot, that’s what.
I’m always down for partaking in dialogues of the sexual nature when it’s appropriate. How you like it, when you like it, what position you like it in, past experiences, embarrassing sex stories, the greatest sex you had, the worst sex you had, and even fetishes. You see, I believe everyone has some type of sexual deviancy in them. They either haven’t found it yet, they choose to suppress it, or they proudly let their freak flags fly. I’m a pretty shy person myself so I really have to trust the person I get with to let them know the real me. Dig?
So when I started dating this guy. We had talked for a couple of months and when things got sexual, we started talking more and more about sexual interest. We had somewhat similar kinks, put together a mental will, won’t, want list of things we would consider in the bedroom. Nothing too crazy. Until we started talking about fetishes and he mentioned feet. Now before I go any further, you have to understand that I have huge interest in how arousal and seeking pleasure varies from person to person. I just find it so interesting.
So when he said he was into feet, I wasn’t disgusted or weirded out at all. I was admittedly perplexed yet excited. I started asking him when he knew he was into it. He said he had discovered the attraction as a kid. I was curious about what type of feet he liked and didn’t like. The conversation then turned to me, telling me that he liked my feet and thought they were hot. And before we go any further, yes he’s a brother, ladies. Fetishes are for all colors of the rainbow.
I asked him if he had ever acted out his fetish with someone in the past and he said no. That’s when I was truly confused. Of course I asked him why, to which he responded, “You’re actually the first person I ever told this to. You’re the person I feel the most comfortable talking to about it.” The feeling was mutual, as I had told him a lot of things about myself sexually that I would never dream of telling anyone I wasn’t serious with. I think that’s what made it easier to be more accepting of the idea of him sucking on my toes, which I had never until this point thought about.
Here’s the Montra: Of course, the first time we had sex, I wasn’t surprised when he brought it up, asking to suck on my recently manicured and clean toes. I will say that one thing I loved about him was that he always asked and never assumed that it was okay to try something new.
As he was looking at my toes, I could tell he was getting aroused, kind of turning me on a little as well. Like I was reacting off of his energy. He was breathing heavily while rubbing my feet which actually felt pretty nice. When he started to suck on my toes however, that took an interesting turn. Feeling a wet tongue on my feet felt really good. I had seen this meme that said the only reason women entertain having their feet sucked is because “It makes y’all p*ssies tingle.” They was right. For some reason, all the licking and sucking he was doing was going straight to my nether regions, making me wet and ready for some action. You can read more about that in “True Story: The Best Sex I Ever Had Was an Unintentional Hook-Up.”
As we continued to date, I didn’t mind entertaining my partner’s foot fetish, however, I found that my acceptance of it would backfire on me at times. He suddenly would always need to see my feet while we were having sex, which meant I would often contort myself into awkward positions where my feet were visible. Of course, this was all upon request. But the requests were frequent. I found myself being okay with it as it challenged my body and made me realize that I was more flexible than I thought. It also made me realize that I need to work out more. These old bones aren’t what they used to be. If we did the same position where I would have to bend my leg a certain way, I would always have a crook in my leg the next day. Not fun.
When we would hang out and I would have my feet out, I would be turning him on without realizing it. And it wasn’t because I assumed so. It was because he told me. I found myself making sure to keep my feet looking nice, even though they always did, because I enjoyed the unsolicited foot rubs I would receive whenever I went to his place. After telling me about his interest in feet, I asked him if he would ever consider working in a shoe store, to which he quickly said no because there would be too much stimulation around him.
After we broke up, I kind of missed the extra attention my feet were getting, but never actively sought out guys who had an interest in feet. I met only one other guy who was into it, but it’s not a requirement. The biggest thing I got out of the experience was being able to give someone pure joy and pleasure in such a unique way, which I strive to do when I can, and within my own limits of course. This is probably the freakiest thing I have done to date. Now that I’m thinking about it, that actually makes me pretty boring. I’m okay with that.
Originally published on CurlyNikki.com