If you are reading this right now, then congratulations. You’ve made it 365 days. A whole year. Despite whatever you have been through, whether you accomplished a lot last year or nothing at all, causing it to see another year is a big deal. A new year in a way is kind of like a new chapter in a book, a continuation of life with a chance to take a fresh perspective on how you think and move throughout the year to make your life and peace of mind stronger and better than last year. I personally don’t believe in making resolutions for the new year because of their too time-sensitive and give many of us anxiety and anguish when we don’t complete the “On Time” or decide to ditch them altogether when it isn’t working out. This is why instead of focusing on New Year’s Resolutions, I want to focus on things we all can do to create peace of mind for ourselves that can also place us in a better state of mind for the entire year.
Don’t Let Anyone Waste Your Time
There’s a big difference between being there for someone and making yourself too available for them, sometimes we can’t tell the difference. Being there for someone in their time of need makes you a good person and often shows a selfless side of you that care others and not just yourself. Making yourself too available for someone, on the other hand, can be bad for you and bad for them. You can find yourself being worn too thin or almost annoyed by them always reaching out to you and they might become so used to you always giving your time away to them at the drop of a dime. They might become dependent on you or see you as expendable. When people see your time as expendable, they aren’t just devaluing your time, they’re devaluing you as a person. Your time doesn’t belong to anyone else but you. Reclaim it.
Know Your Worth
Don’t put up with poor treatment from anyone just because you think you should for someone else’s or your own personal interest. Some of us practice delayed gratification in the most destructive ways possible. Putting up with someone’s bullshit with the idea that things may eventually get better is a tale I know all too well. From my personal experience, it doesn’t get better. It gets worse. When you allow someone to treat you poorly, that person’s behavior will only calcify into permanence and deviating behavior or even reckless behavior with you. I’m not just talking self-esteem here. When someone shows you who they are, believe them and believe that you deserve better and don’t tolerate shitty people being shitty to you.
Save Space for People Who Matter
At times, we need to re-evaluate who we have allowed into our circle. The people we have in our circle are supposed to support and inspire us to do and be better. If you notice that the people in your circle only take from you or put down others, its time to let them go. We don’t always pay close attention to the actions of others because we don’t necessarily take on their views of the world completely, but there is a sense of like-mindedness to them as it relates to you if you choose to associate with them. If you hear your friends, family, or whoever is close to you talking poorly or treating others poorly, imagine what they are doing when your not around. Think about the values and morals you believe in and think about the people who you have around you and how
Leave What Isn’t for You
This was something I struggled greatly with last year. I’ve always felt like things fall into place the way they do for a reason. So when I meet that special someone or an opportunity swings my way, I jump at it, and that’s something I rarely do because I don’t believe everything that comes my way is for me. I rarely ever find myself feeling as though I missed out on anything that I wasn’t sure about in the first place. But when something just feels so right, we sometimes dedicate ourselves to a lost cause because it’s our cause. We have invested so much into something, that the thought of just leaving uncompleted or not turning that next page to see what will happen bothers us and can leave us with a sense of failure.
In philosophy, this referred to as the Sunk-Cost Fallacy. We feel the need to invest more time and resources into something without taking into consideration what we have already invested and usually end up losing more in the process. It’s never easy to give up on anything or anyone you are passionate about. But vibes don’t lie. When the energy your giving is no longer being matched, its time to walk away. I heard this in a Carpenter’s song: Knowing when to leave can be the smartest thing anyone can learn. Karen was telling the truth. Learn to be okay with leaving things unfinished and unknown.
Final Thoughts
I aspire to inspire others to take time to reflect on themselves from last year and take charge of creating a prosperous, opulent, and conducive 2020 vision for ourselves and those around us. I’m not necessarily talking about just mental health, but mental clarity and peace of mind. Decluttering our minds of the things that occupy and hold us back from being our best selves. So, what does your 2020 vision look like?
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